Monday, November 26, 2012

The 3 Steps to Self Empowerment - The Self Esteem Blog

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Posted by Dr. Irene on November 26, 2012 ? Leave a Comment?

By Christine Gabb -

Em?power?ment. A strong word carrying a suggestion of control, authority, influence, strength, energy. It?s a word that makes you believe that if you have it, anything is possible.

Everyday you are given messages about how to live your life. Some call it intuition others gut instinct? different names, same meaning. These messages come in many forms and many guises.

Some are easily recognizable such as fear. When I talk about the word fear I don?t mean fearful. I mean the fear that surfaces when you are in imminent danger ? that lurching feeling you have in your stomach standing on the edge of a cliff perhaps, or when the hairs stand up on the back of your neck for no apparent reason. These are the messages that you usually pay attention to because they are very clear ? danger, run.

Other messages that come to you are more subtle and harder to interpret. These are the messages that keep you in integrity and allow you to be true to yourself. They build your self esteem, motivate you and create your belief structure. Unfortunately these are also the ones that you can most easily dismissed or deny.

Negative peer pressure is a classic example of doing something that your ?instinct? or ?gut feeling? is advising you not to do ? but you do it anyway regardless that it will take you out of integrity. People in emotionally abusive relationships are another example of how one individual has the ability to dis-empower another. The abused person has allowed the abuser to manipulate them into denying their instincts about who they believe they are.

The more you deny your inner voice and stop listening to your intuition or gut feelings the less power and control you have over your reality.

STEP 1: BELIEVE IT

Your beliefs are the foundation for your reality ? what you believe will be so. Most of your beliefs are formed in childhood. They are conclusions you have formed based on your experiences as a child. Growing up in a loving and supportive environment will provide you with very different belief than if you grew up in a shameful and abusive family.

Self-limiting beliefs are perhaps the most detrimental of all since they will keep you from the success that you want, but don?t believe you can attain. As Henry Ford, a prominent American industrialist and founder of the Ford Motor Company so aptly put ?Whether you think you can or you can?t, you are right!?

If you believe that most people are good at heart and want to do the right thing, most people in your life will fit that description. Similarly, if you believe that you will never get out of debt, you probably never will. You might say you haven?t chosen to be in an abusive relationship, or poverty, or have ill health, or be lonely but you will have chosen what you think about it, how you deal with each circumstance and what you expect will happen from it.

Ask your self the following questions:

How is my behaviour governed by my beliefs?

What belief or principle am I functioning out of here?

Is that belief serving me well or hindering me?

What could I do about it?

STEP 2: TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

You are the master of what happens in your life? your current reality has been created in one of two ways: consciously or unconsciously.

Conscious creation is when you are pro-active in the process of creating what you want. This is typically driven by the desire for positive outcomes for those who have the underlying belief that conscious creation is possible. Conscious creation can create both positive and negative outcomes based purely on the person?s belief structure at the time.

Unconscious creation is when you allow events to determine your reality. The underlying belief will be that life just happens to you and therefore you react to circumstances as and when they occur. In this instance you are more than likely ?un-conscious? that you have any control over your reality so will be unaware of the impact your thoughts and spoken words have on what you are attracting into your life.

By gaining control of your reality through the act of conscious creation, you can change things and bring what you want into your life, whether it?s health, prosperity or overall happiness. Conscious creation is being clear about what you want, believing you can get it and not being owned by the outcome. This law, when understood and practiced, can help anyone to manifest the things in life that they truly want.

Which statement rings true for you? Why?

1. Everything that happens to me in my life is a direct result of my own actions or thoughts. Either consciously or unconsciously I have created the circumstances for these events to occur.

2. I am a victim of circumstance or chance, and everything that happens in my life is the direct result of what others have done to me.

STEP 3: REFRAME YOUR PERSPECTIVE

If you don?t like what you are thinking, seeing, doing ? change it.

A perspective is a point of view. It is your perspective that determines your experience, not your circumstances. Imagine looking at an abstract painting hanging in an art gallery. The lack of recognizable form gives you the opportunity for interpretation ? to you the dark smudges you see nestled between two large smudges of blue paint may make you think you see a flock of sheep grazing in a valley between two mountains; to someone else it could be clouds colliding on a stormy evening and the dark smudges portray the intensity of the storm.

The painting hasn?t changed ? its how the individual has interpreted it that is different. If you are able to change your perspective on what is happening to you, you are giving yourself the opportunity to experience it differently.

As a wise man once said to me ?there is very little you can do about other people?s behaviour but you can do a lot about the way you are reacting to it?.

Think of a specific problem that you are struggling with right now.

How could you change the way you see this situation?

What does your ?gut? saying to you? What feels right to you?

What fears or inner drives are influencing you with your perspective?

This is your life ? make it your own!

Christine is a certified Emotional Transformation Coach helping professional women in unhealthy relationships gain back control of their lives. You can reach her at her website http://www.emotionaltransformation.ca and her blog at http://www.inwardreflection.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christine_Gabb
http://EzineArticles.com/?The-3-Steps-to-Self-Empowerment&id=6268955

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Source: http://theselfesteemblog.com/self-esteem/featured-articles/the-3-steps-to-self-empowerment/

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